The spirit of Beauty: The Beginning

Just like in nature the decomposing of a plant makes possible the rich soil for another to be grown, life allows situation and eras to die and decompose to make way for new beginnings. Whats truly amazing about that is no matter how rough or unsavory the past, there is always the potential for it to be turned into the healthiest of soils. All of this makes the word beginning have so much meaning, it not only implies the new, but also all that has been and changed to make way for the reincarnation of now.This pattern is is constantly played out in my life. The death of an era of going to a group of places, seeing specific faces and following a certain schedules, many of which fall a way but their experience provided to me allows for a new cycle, constantly evolving but never forgetting the roots from which my experiences grew. A friend of mine explained to me very simply the bases of existentialism being that you are your essence which is made of of all the experiences you in body, and in that truth you have the ability to shape your future by your choices, and you always have a choice. So this is my first entry, a new beginning flourishing from old soil, an embraced reincarnation which furthers my own chosen destiny.

I was living in Venice, cooking in a kitchen and struggling against a constant internal polarity. I had graduated from cooking school two summers earlier. i am a passionate foodie. I get excited about flavors flirting with each other on a plate, colors swirling together and aromatic steam wafting, all the more beautiful because it will be a singularly unique experience. Cooking is almost like an installation piece with an incredibly short period of time to appreciate, make it all the more special. So i pursued a career, and had some great experiences but evolved into resent. The kitchen that was the place to finally make me realize how miserable i was was the tipping point for me to empower myself to leave. The owner of this restaurant is a great man, and as i was telling him i was quitting he told me something i will never forget, it was very simply - If your not happy now, you cant expect to be happy in six months,a year, or 5 years from now, when what you do stops making you happy, its time for something new. This is a man who for years was a social worker, then one day it stopped making him happy, he then traveled all over and collected ideas and recipes and opened up not one but 2 popular restaurants that also act a great community hubs. So I took action, the idea was presented to me by my boyfriend, and once it came out of his mouth it all snapped together like puzzle pieces. A career as a makeup artist.

Once i decide to go for something i will admit i can be headstrong and stubborn, but i don't neccesarily think that's bad. This symptom almost gives me tunnel vision which motivates me and i become very ambitious, nothing can get in my way. I was given a contact with a women who's big in the field of makeup behind the camera. We talked, i asked questions, she helped me have a more realistic view of my potential future, and she helped guide me to a school that would help prepare me for a career. So i enrolled.

It's funny how in one moment is gunge ho and the next nervous anxiety. It was like the curtain fell and everything became real. Ill admit my mind is overactive at times, and the future is a thought too often, but i was playing out what was to come, who i would meet, the situations i would be in, the places i would live, i was riddled with the anxiety of making the right choices for myself. Finally i calmed down and trusted i would allow all the right things to happen at the right time and let myself continue forward. I let myself begin.

So that brings me current. I started at Cinema Makeup school Monday the 21st of may, and I'm feeling good. I'm learning all the basics, specifically beauty 101. First day was a long lecture, 2nd nude beauty (purely enhances features without obvious makeup), 3rd classic , 4rth dramatic (think classy red carpet), 5th glamorous (smokey eye). So he'res some pictures!